You don’t need an avatar. If you’re in any kind of entrepreneurial space, I know you’ve seen the concept of the “Client Avatar” floating around. And there are people who SWEAR by the avatar. They will tell you that you can’t market or sell anything without an avatar. But here’s what I’d like to offer you: That’s bullshit. It’s truly one (of many) of my least favorite holdovers from old-school advertising that has made its way into content marketing.

Hi, I’m Keli. I’m your life coach now. Twice a month, in accordance with the lunar cycles, we gather in circle here and in your inbox for a salaciously good time. We talk sex, self-care, and reclaiming what has always been ours via ritualized practices and hexing shitty politicians. And for my entrepreneurial babes out there, you’re getting a little bonus sales tip, too.

How do you define success? That’s a big question. And it spans many areas of life. So it may be difficult to answer. But let’s break it down: We’ll start with career. How do you define career success?

These aren’t testimonials my clients have sent me in response to some leading questions about our work together. Nor are they pieces of information anyone has asked to be shared for the purpose of marketing and selling “working with me.” (No shade against testimonials. I use them. This just isn’t that.) This isn’t about me at all. It’s a moment for us to celebrate the astounding accomplishments these women have achieved. Because they deserve to be celebrated. (Even if they’re anonymized to protect their privacy and retain their rights for consent.)

Hi, I’m Keli. I’m your life coach now. Twice a month, in accordance with the lunar cycles, we gather in circle here and in your inbox for a salaciously good time. We talk sex, self-care, and reclaiming what has always been ours via ritualized practices and hexing shitty politicians. And for my entrepreneurial babes out there, you’re getting a little bonus sales tip, too.

The last couple of years have been fucking rough. I know that’s true of a lot of people for a lot of reasons. But for me, it’s been largely related to recovery from an abusive situation. Recovery is a tough road. Regardless of what you’re recovering from. And this has been no different. My life was sort of flipped upside down, then shaken and jostled on repeat for a couple of years until I was sort of thrown out of the container completely. Unceremoniously. The path of healing from everything that transpired has been difficult. And slow. And often painful. And to this day, it is still quite uncertain.

I’m going back to France this September. Wanna go with me? You’re absolutely invited! Only a handful of spots are left open, and I’d love to reserve one for you! But, like, what’s the purpose of this trip? ← That’s a great question, and it’s one that a lot of folks have been asking my co-host, Sarah Magnoni and me. Sarah is a marketing consultant by day and psychic medium by night. I’m a sales coach in one leg of my business, and I also hang out in the Akashic records. So we’re putting this shit together in a way that’s a bit nontraditional. A bit unconventional. A bit off-putting to a lot of folks. WHICH IS HOW WE KNOW IT’S RIGHT.

Hi, I’m Keli. I’m your life coach now. Twice a month, in accordance with the lunar cycles, we gather in circle here and in your inbox for a salaciously good time. We talk sex, self-care, and reclaiming what has always been ours via ritualized practices and hexing shitty politicians. And for my entrepreneurial babes out there, you’re getting a little bonus sales tip, too.

Here’s a hard truth that I’ve never really talked about. As a sales coach, I offer an incredible program called SellingU. It has a community level that’s got a pretty low-cost point of entry, and it’s FULL of valuable content, practical application, and tactical support for both mindset and skill set. It has an in-depth mastermind level that’s a higher price point with a hell of a lot more guidance and hands-on work. And when I first started my entrepreneurial journey, I wouldn’t have joined something like SellingU. When I shifted my career into coaching, I wouldn’t have joined something like SellingU.

For the last several weeks, I’ve been handing out free shit like candy. (Free workbooks like candy? Free shit like workbooks? Eh. Whatever.) I’ve got another free guide for you today. This one is a 7-day journey into discovering and honing your authentic AF sales voice. The assignment is simple: Sell someone or something ELSE every day for a week. You’re not selling your products, services, or opportunities. You’re selling your friend’s art exhibit. Or the cupcake shop you’re obsessed with that the world NEEDS to know about.

Hi, I’m Keli. I’m your life coach now. Twice a month, in accordance with the lunar cycles, we gather in circle here and in your inbox for a salaciously good time. We talk sex, self-care, and reclaiming what has always been ours via ritualized practices and hexing shitty politicians. And for my entrepreneurial babes out there, you’re getting a little bonus sales tip, too.

In no way do I pretend to know what’s right for you. I do, however, know that if you’re an entrepreneur, solopreneur, or in any kind of sales, the bullshit you’re telling yourself about sales is not helpful to you. So, I’ve made you (yes, another) free workbook. Contained within the pages of the Reclaiming Sales workbook are pieces of my proven sales philosophy. I offer them to you for several reasons. First, because, as I stated above, we need to reclaim sales. From whom? From the shitty bro marketers, the shitty “hey girl” MLM copy/paste methodologies, and the shitty societal connotations of a balding man with a wet cigar hanging out of his mouth and his chest hair popping out of his partially unbuttoned shirt trying to pressure you into a used car that you absolutely do not want.

Why reclaim gratitude? Because of BULLSHIT SOCIALIZATION, of course! Because those of us raised and socialized as girls and women are taught, in both big and small ways, using gratitude as a catalyst, to stay small. “Just be grateful for what you have,” they say. Meaning, “Stop wanting more.” Leading to, “Stop wanting…at all.” Gratitude has been coopted by puritanical, white-supremacist patriarchy and late-stage capitalism as a weapon of oppression. If we stop wanting more, we’ll settle for what’s handed to us. Those in power get to stay in power. And we learn to live off of less than what we truly desire.

Hi, I’m Keli. I’m your life coach now. Twice a month, in accordance with the lunar cycles, we gather in circle here and in your inbox for a salaciously good time. We talk sex, self-care, and reclaiming what has always been ours via ritualized practices and hexing shitty politicians. And for my entrepreneurial babes out there, you’re getting a little bonus sales tip, too.

So let’s talk about how you’re not gonna fuck yourself over this year by giving away all your time, and instead, you’re gonna reclaim your time for your damn self. Shall we? This week, I’m offering you another free resource. In the Reclaiming Time workbook, you’ll do a calendar refresh that will allow you to create a schedule for yourself that is truly FOR yourself. Before we get there, though, if you haven’t downloaded and worked through the Cyclical Reflection Ritual I offered a couple of weeks ago in the Reclaiming Reflection workbook, I highly recommend doing that before applying anything to your calendar.

Most challenges will push you into a hustle-and-grind kind of space. NOT THIS ONE! This is a challenge to rest. I’m calling it a nap challenge, but truly, I don’t give the slightest fuck whether or not you actually fall asleep. I’m simply challenging you to step away from the hustle and grind, get your body into a comfortable position, shut out the visual stimulation, either turn off auditory stimulation or transition to something meditative and relaxing, and truly rest. Take a nap — or at least provide your body and mind with the opportunity for a nap — for at least 15 minutes a day for 30 days.

Hi, I’m Keli. I’m your life coach now. Twice a month, in accordance with the lunar cycles, we gather in circle here and in your inbox for a salaciously good time. We talk sex, self-care, and reclaiming what has always been ours via ritualized practices and hexing shitty politicians. And for my entrepreneurial babes out there, you’re getting a little bonus sales tip, too.

We are about to endure the onslaught of “NEW YEAR NEW YOU” bullshit. And I’d love to offer you an alternative.

You, my darling love bug, are not going to be a different person on January 1 than you are on December 31. And you’re not going to be a different person on January 2 than you are on January 1. You’re not even going to be a different person in January than you are TODAY.

You will, in fact, be the same person. And if that’s disappointing news to you, I’m so sorry to be the truth bearer today.

HEAL THYSELF! One must be HEALED to move forward! If you don’t HEAL, you’ll stay stuck in the past…FOREVERRRRRRRR!!! Everyone’s talking about HEALING — childhood trauma, relationship trauma, ANCESTRAL trauma, fucking PAST LIFE trauma! “I’m healing my ancestral money wounds for my grandmother who couldn’t get out of poverty,” and such. No shade to any actual healing. Truly. That last one is something that someone I deeply respect said to me recently. And it’s valuable. BUT, like, what the fuck does healing even mean? And how does one HEAL?

Hi, I’m Keli. I’m your life coach now. Twice a month, in accordance with the lunar cycles, we gather in circle here and in your inbox for a salaciously good time. We talk sex, self-care, and reclaiming what has always been ours via ritualized practices and hexing shitty politicians. And for my entrepreneurial babes out there, you’re getting a little bonus sales tip, too.