Reclaiming Séks
When was the last time you wore something for the sole purpose of feeling sexy? ← No, seriously. Answer this question for yourself.
If the answer is specific, and it’s within the last month, great! My message to you is simply this: Do that again sometime in the next week.
However, I’m gonna need you to read on and take some notes for yourself if the answer is some sort of vague notion of a past time, a complete “No fucking idea when the last time was” notion, or a roll of the eyes and “Ha! I don’t do that!”
What does sexy even feel like? If we were to say that sexy is an emotional state we can be in, with emotions being felt via physiological responses in the body, think back to a time you felt the most sexy and consider what that felt like.
Where do you feel the sensations of sexy?
Describe those sensations. Are there tingles? Pulls? Aches? What else?
If they have colors, movement, sparkles, shapes, etc., describe those, as well.
What are you thinking when you feel sexy? ← This part is crucial because our emotional states are cognitively generated. Or, to put it more simply, our thoughts create our emotions. So, keying into what you’re thinking when you feel sexy helps you to take charge of those feelings and generate them any time you want to.
Though it’s our thoughts that generate our emotions, there are often external triggers that prime our brains to produce those thoughts. And for feeling sexy, what you wear can be an excellent trigger. Given that Halloween is in later this month, maybe there’s a costume you’d like to wear to feel sexy. Maybe for you, lingerie is what feels sexy. Perhaps you feel sexy in a suit. Or boxers and a tie. Or specific undergarments — or no undergarments at all!
Once you’ve pinned down what sexy feels like for you and what you tend to think that generates those feelings, your next step is to consider what, when you wear it, helps trigger those thoughts.
And the final step: WEAR IT! At some point over the next week, wear what feels sexy to you. It can be for 5 minutes or a whole day. But wear it. And if the mirror is a problem for you, stay away from it. This assignment is about what your body FEELS like, not what your perception is of what it looks like.
Feel into your body as you adorn yourself with sexy. Revel in the sensations. And if you’re a member of Project Reclamation (and it feels good to you to do so), share your experience in the group!
