Reclaiming Celebration

One of my clients said it best when she described the difference between coaching and therapy this way: “There’s been a big, dark box in the corner of my mind. Therapy helped me to open and dig through the box. Coaching helped me figure out what to do with what I found inside.”

We often think of the things in the box as all the muck and grime we’ve carried with us. We’re sort of conditioned to believe that things like therapy and coaching are exclusively reserved for solving problems and examining what’s “wrong” so we can fix it.

But that’s only about 50% of what coaching is.

Once we get to a place where we’re no longer just wading through shit, and we’re walking upright on stable, solid ground, that’s not the end. It’s simply the beginning of something new.

That’s when we get to dream, imagine, and create our lives by design. Which we can’t possibly do from beneath the surface, because we can’t even see that as a possibility.

In fact, when I’m working with a client and they’re struggling with something, feeling anxious or fearful, angry or frustrated, victimized or helpless, I’ll often ask, “If you could choose to feel anything about this, what would you feel?” The most common answer: CALM.

That’s not the real answer. Ever. But it’s the best that seems available from within the struggle. Wading through the shit, the best that seems available is standing on solid ground. Calm.

But from the ground, we can build.

And THAT is what today is about.

Inside Project Reclamation, the coaching, grounding, and book club calls I host all happen on Wednesdays. And any month with five Wednesdays gets a bonus call. On that fifth Wednesday of the month, the call is a special coaching call dedicated to celebrations. We call it a Victory Call, and it’s a concept that evolved organically from within my client list.

Several of my 1:1 clients either start their calls with celebrations or will come to a call saying, “I just want to celebrate today!”

It’s hard to celebrate when you’re just wading through shit. Once you’re on solid ground, though, you can take a moment to look around and see what’s working, what’s beautiful, what’s available for appreciation. And it’s that practice that allows for growth and building.

So, with today being the fifth Wednesday of October, not only is there a Project Reclamation Victory Call tonight at 6pm central (seriously, are you in that membership yet?) I also want to invite YOU to celebrate.

If you’ve been wading through shit, grab ahold of some small piece of solid ground. And if you’re fully standing up, take a moment to look around.

What’s going well? And what is exclusively within your realm of control that directly relates to what’s going well?

For example: If your relationship is going well, and you’ve been checking your knee-jerk reactions to your partner to ask yourself about the intention your partner has vs the default lens through which you see them because of the relationship examples you were provided as a child, THAT’S A BIG FUCKING DEAL. Take credit for it. Own it. Celebrate it. Because YOU have control over whether you give into what has become default based on the socialization you received or you get curious about it. Which means YOU are in control over your knee-jerk reactions. And that willingness to get curious and live by intention, rather than by default, allows you to show up to the relationship differently, which has a direct impact on the relationship.

So, what’s going well for you? And what can you celebrate about how you’re directly responsible for what’s going well?

Seriously! Tell me! I want to celebrate with you!

And if you’re a member of Project Reclamation, tell me about it on the call tonight! I can’t wait to see you there!