Reclaiming Sex

Sex can be a really challenging topic for a lot of individuals. Get into a relationship, and that only magnifies the challenges for everyone involved. Whether you have one or multiple partners, those conversations can be fraught and full of anxiety.

One of the biggest benefits I found to the purchase of a sex toy — be it a vibrator, a feather tickler, or a simple blindfold — over the course of my 12-year previous career selling them was that the object can provide an opening for communication.

When you bring an object into the sexual experience, it gives you something specific to talk ABOUT rather than talking about the big, scary topic of sex.

“We’re not talking about ME right now. We’re not talking about MY sexuality. We’re not talking about YOU right now. We’re not talking about YOUR sexuality. We’re talking about this thing right here that is neither me nor you and is separate from us both.”

So if you and your partner(s) are struggling to communicate openly about sex, try bringing a new item into the bedroom. Talk about the thing. And see where the conversation goes.